Spiritual Bypassing by Robert Augustus Masters Ph.D

Author:Robert Augustus Masters, Ph.D. [Masters, Robert Augustus, PhD]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-58394-292-5
Publisher: North Atlantic Books
Published: 2010-12-23T05:00:00+00:00

13

DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY?

The separate self—the seemingly autonomous “I” or personality of everyday experience—is not looked upon with much favor in some spiritual circles, probably because so many of us over-associate it with ego. This “I” can manifest at one extreme as narcissism or excessive self-concern (a tempest in a me-knot), and at the other extreme as healthy, full-blown individuality. But no matter how mature this “I” appears, it may still be viewed as an obstacle to spiritual realization by those overly enamored with the concept of oneness, resulting in a devaluing of the personal relative to the spiritual.

Spiritual paths that overvalue and cling to the notion of transcendence tend to pathologize ego, seeing it as no more than something that has to be overcome or eradicated if we are to spiritually awaken—and so “I” is treated as no more than an incarnational tagalong of a decidedly lower vibration, at best adding a bit of color and flair to the proceedings. While less depersonalized spiritual paths may acknowledge the value of individuation and personality, they may still too readily conflate these with ego, encouraging us not to take things personally since doing so might entrench us in ego-centered responses.

Depersonalized spirituality is an anemic undertaking in which hollowness is confused with transparency, ungroundedness with altitude, flimsy boundaries with openness, and emotional flatness with equanimity. When we’re in its grip, we usually don’t bother differentiating between egoity and individuality, keeping ourselves busy fueling and marketing the Oneness Express and the Transcendence Monorail, preaching the gospel of nonseparation even as we advocate separating from or getting rid of ego. We may, if we are caught up in spiritual bypassing, be psyched about the notion that everything is all One, but when it comes down to being one with our “lower” qualities like our anger or greed, we much prefer cutting ourselves off from them, even as we pay lip service to their being one with everything else.

Such a demoting of—and disengaging from—individuation, especially its passionately alive, deeply engaged aspects, is central to spiritual bypassing, constituting not freedom from “selfing” (the process of generating a sense of self) but a refusal to fully develop and embody a self, to individualize. Yes, our sense of self or personality can itself be observed, demonstrating that our true identity lies beyond it, but such observation is not of much use if we employ it to withdraw from or marginalize the personal.

No matter how we treat it, our personality persists. Some of it evolves and some of it doesn’t, successfully resisting every remedial program, spiritual or otherwise, that is aimed at it. Once we are on our way to cutting through our spiritual ambition, we realize that although there is no need to transform our personality, there is a need to learn to relate to it rather than just to identify with it.

This does not mean, however, that we have to distance ourselves from our personality and its quirks but rather that we need to cultivate just enough separation to bring it into clear focus, at which point we can develop an intimacy with it.

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